Losing weight is one of the most common New
Year’s resolutions. Why do so many
people struggle and fail? Here are the
top ten reasons.
1.
Focusing on the Wrong Thing
If you want to lose excess weight, do you think your goal should be a
particular number on the scale? Think
again! If you really want to succeed,
for the long term as well as the short, you have to focus on strategies and
skills which are supported by research.
As one patient said, “If I start wrong, I’ll end wrong.” Very true.
To borrow a term from my colleague Dr. David
Katz of Yale, success requires “skillpower” more than willpower. Learning what works from an expert who knows
the science, practicing the techniques until they become “second nature”, and
having support to get back on track when you inevitably slip (no one is
perfect) are keys for sustainable, healthy weight.
2.
Falling for Fads
Fad diets, quick fixes, and ads for “magic
bullets” for weight loss are a waste our valuable time, energy, and money. Even worse, they steal our self-esteem and
momentum. The real danger of fad diets is that since they don’t work, they make
people discouraged, and feel like failures. People can end up feeling exhausted
and depressed, and give up on healthy lifestyle change.
Don’t let fad diets steal your thunder! It makes more sense to invest in our health,
learn what actually works, and focus our energy on effective changes, not waste
time on snake oil.
There is actually fairly robust science which
tells us which strategies are likely to yield the best results - and learning
what they are can make all the difference in your success.
3.
Making Too Many Changes - or Too Few
If we try to change too much, too quickly, we can become overwhelmed, and give
up. On the other hand, if we make too FEW changes, we will not see any
significant results, and we will also give up! For example, have you ever
thrown yourself into an extreme diet or exercise regimen, only to find it is too
complicated or too unpleasant? Nearly every one of us has done that at some
point, and we just stop. On the other
hand, have you ever decided you’ll try to lose weight just by parking a little
farther out in the parking lot, and walking a tiny bit more? Walking is great,
and we should try to sneak in activity whenever we can, but it is unrealistic
to expect substantial weight loss from a relatively minor change.
When it comes to healthy lifestyle change, we
need to find the “sweet spot” - not so little that we see no results and get
frustrated, but not so many that we become overwhelmed and give up. Finding the
sweet spot can be tough, and it can be hard to decide what to change first.
Many people benefit from having an expert
evaluate their current lifestyle and challenges, and help lay out a plan to
move forward at just the right pace. An
expert can also help you sort out your long term goals (“where you want to go”),
and design a research-based path (“the best way to get there.”)
4.
Trying to Go It Alone
I’m not sure if it’s our Puritan heritage, our
rugged American individualism (and I’m certainly a product of both myself), or
something else, but too many people feel deep in their hearts that they should
be able to win the weight loss battle all by themselves. They feel guilty, even like failures when
they need assistance, support, and guidance.
Don’t fall for it! No man (or woman) is an
island. Get the help you need - you
deserve it! Research from the National
Weight Control Registry, a database of remarkably successful people who have
lost an astonishing amount of weight, and kept it off for long term, reveals
that most people who succeed have
professional support. We live in a very challenging modern world which makes it
difficult to control our weight; experts call it an “obesogenic
environment”. In short, we are
challenged on all sides - by “addictive food”, stress, sedentary lifestyles,
poor quality sleep, nutritional deficiencies and more. We can use all the help we can get to fight
back, and thrive through it all. Don’t try to go it alone - and don’t feel bad
for needing a support team!
5.
Failing to Plan, or Planning to Fail
Without a plan, we are doomed to fail. But we need more than a vague plan - we need
specifics. The devil, and the angel, are
in the details. A plan without details,
without specifics, is not really a plan at all. For example, if you tell
yourself you are going to “eat better”, but do not have a shopping list, a meal
plan, and do not have any support or accountability, you are unlikely to
succeed.
The best plans are realistic, detailed,
science-based. The plans should be realistic given your lifestyle, needs, and
preferences. Any food plan should meet
the “four enoughs” criteria - it should be simple enough, tasty enough, filling
enough, and should yield “good enough” results.
If your plan is not working, don’t give up on your health - instead,
re-evaluate your plan.
6.
Perfectionism: The Perfect Trap
Perfectionism can be a double-edged sword - it
can work for us, or against us. Have you heard the expression “don’t let the
perfect be the enemy of the good”? Being
conscientious and focused, goal-oriented, and detail-oriented can be helpful -
BUT - too much of a good tendency can backfire.
A common trap is trying to be perfect, and when we can’t live up to
that, giving up entirely (and beating ourselves up.) “All or nothing” thinking
often leads so “nothing” in the end!
People most susceptible to this are
high-performing, successful, go-getter, often “Type A personalities.” They are often successful as parents, in
careers, in creative endeavors, in the community and more - and are all the
more frustrated because they are “failing” when it comes to achieving a healthy
weight and healthy lifestyle. What they
really need to do is give themselves a break!
No one is perfect, and life gets in the way of the most perfect plans.
Rather than deny perfectionist tendencies, or
let them get in our way, let’s make them work FOR OUR SUCCESS. Plan ahead to have some wiggle room in your
diet, exercise routine, and lifestyle in general. If you need to quantify it, many people use
the 80-20 rule - they stay on track at least 80% of the time, but give
themselves 20% wiggle room. Remember, no
one is perfect, and if you hold yourself to an impossible standard, you will be
disappointed. The best goal is to be
“good enough” following your new lifestyle to achieve the health and weight
goals you’d like. Let “progress, not
perfection” become your motto.
7. Quitting when you fall off the wagon.
It takes smokers an average of FIVE
attempts before successfully quitting - and that involves changing just one
habit. Weight loss involves multiple
changes, so don’t be too hard on yourself if you have tried, slipped off track,
and find you need to try again. Rather than think of past weight loss attempts
as failures, treat them as learning experiences, and “partial successes”. Look back at what did work, what you liked,
go back to tried and true tactics, and carry those forward into your new plan.
It’s also important to look back at what did NOT work, as well. Analyzing challenges is not “making excuses”,
it is a necessary step to plan ahead to overcome those challenges in the
future. Sometimes there is a single trigger that throws us off track, over and
over. Once we know that trigger, we can make plans to circumvent it.
And don’t forget: plan ahead to “mess up”. Yes, you read that correctly. People in the National Weight Control
Registry who are extraordinarily successful in losing weight, and keeping it
off, are not perfect, it turns out. They
are, however, very good at forgiving themselves and have a plan in place to get
right back on track! Have your support
team and “rapid recovery” plan all set BEFORE the inevitable happens. A successful patient once told me, “I finally
figured it out, everyone falls off the wagon, then we have a choice - climb
back on the wagon, or let it run over us!” She does not let the wagon run over
her any more.
8. Having
“Unmet Needs”
If we
are deprived of any of our basic human needs - sleep, relaxation, recreation,
time alone, time with others, spiritual needs, creative needs, the need to
connect with something larger than ourselves, the need to feel like we are contributing
to the world - it is easy to turn to food to fill the gap. If you find you are
eating out of control, stop and ask yourself if there is another “need” that is
going unmet. It’s easy to make the
mistake of EATING to try to fill those needs - but remember “If the inner baby
is crying, maybe he or she isn’t hungry for food.” Figuring out what we REALLY need can take a
little time and reflection, and sometimes talking to someone can help.
9.
Forgetting to Have Fun
Life is too short to miss out on fun - and the
good news is that allowing yourself a little indulgence - even “being a little
bad” can have very good weight results in the end.
Let yourself feel like you’ve treated yourself
a bit, or even that you have “gotten away with something”. This strategy is actually based on research
which shows that people can only stand feeling deprived for so long… then they
‘act up’ in some way. If they are on a
very tight financial budget, they tend to overindulge in unhealthy foods. And if they “treat themselves” in a non-food
way (indulging in some retail therapy, sneaking away to a bookstore or cafe,
stealing some me-time with a favorite hobby, a quick spa treatment, or a warm
bath) they may find it easier to control their eating, and stay on track with
healthy food patterns.
10.
Having a Hidden Medical Road Block
I have attended more medical weight management
courses, conferences, and symposiums than I can count over the past 20 years,
from Harvard, to the Obesity Society, the Obesity Medical Association, and more
(and have contributed my fair share of lectures). One of the favorite topics which is revised,
again and again, is the challenge of hidden medical causes of weight gain.
There are numerous causes, including undiagnosed or suboptimally managed medical
conditions (everything from vitamin D deficiency, to hypothyroidism, sleep
apnea, prediabetes, metabolic syndrome, Cushing’s Syndrome, and more),
prescription medications (for depression, high blood pressure, chronic pain,
and more), even over-the-counter medications.
A favorite “trick question” for physicians new to the field is to ask
them to review a medical history for a hidden cause of weight gain...and the
answer is Tylenol PM for sleep, since it contains diphenhydramine (also known
as Benadryl).
Strangely, even though these causes are easily spotted by experts who are
board-certified in Obesity Medicine, they are often overlooked by physicians
who are not trained in medical weight management. How can that be?
Don’t be angry at your other physicians, if
they have not spotted a contributing factor.
The reality is that very little attention is given to medical causes or
treatment of obesity in most medical schools, or even in residencies (including
primary care residencies). In order to learn to become an expert in the field,
physicians must pursue advanced training, either through course programs
offered by several medical organizations, or through a fellowship in Obesity
Medicine. Once the coursework is completed and certified, physicians may submit
an application to take a comprehensive exam.
Once approved they may sit for the exam, and if they pass, they receive
board certification by the American Board of Obesity Medicine. When I originally received my board
certification, there were two additional steps: an oral examination before the
board, and a site visit by a board member, which included a full view of
practices and procedures, as well as a chart review (we were required to be in
practice for a full year before we would could apply for certification).
Certification has become more streamlined and focused, and multiple physician
organizations have come together with the new process.
Many physicians are only now learning about the subspecialty of Obesity
Medicine, and are just beginning to realize that Obesity can be a complex
medical challenge - but one that may be treated successfully, using a variety
of methods and tools now available. If you would like a full evaluation to
search for hidden medical road blocks to weight loss, and a plan to address
them, you may want to meet with an Obesity Medicine specialist.
So there you have it, the top ten reasons weight loss
resolutions fail, and some strategies which can create success.
If you would like help on your journey to a healthier weight and lifestyle, we
are here for you! Call any time at (603)
379-6500, and read more at healthyweightcenter.com
