Allure Magazine: Hunger Triggers, Part I: Eating with Friends

Health writer Rory Evans contributes to many magazines, and frequently consults multiple experts for advice for her articles. I’ve helped Rory with health and nutrition stories over the years, and had a chance to contribute to her latest article, “Hunger Triggers” in the April 2010 Allure Magazine.

Her article is available now in stores; her version used several different experts. When Rory first emailed me questions for this story, I answered with my version. I addressed four different scenarios that can trigger overeating, based on various studies and research Here is the first part of my version, below:

Scenario #1:
Eating with Thin Friends, and Eating with large groups.

People who struggle with their weight sometimes are angry that their “naturally thin” friends “get to eat anything they want.” It is understandable that this can be annoying, because it seems unfair. In reality, it *is* unfair!

But there are different ways to respond to this reality.
You can be in denial, and pretend that you can eat just as many calories.
You can be angry, and overeat in a “shoot yourself in the foot” kind of way.
Or you can accept that people have very different metabolisms, for many reasons, and move forward to take charge of your life.

The reality is that people have different genetics, different lifestyles, different activity levels during the day, different amounts of formal exercise, different medical issues and medications, and different stress levels. All of these can affect how many calories a person needs in a day. Some people really DO burn more calories than others.

But it doesn’t matter what your friend is doing, you have to do what is right for you. And besides, you don’t know what your friend is doing the rest of the time; she might be eating a lot less than you think at her other meals. Studies show that most slender people DO in fact monitor their food intake - even if they deny it, or don’t realize they are doing it.

It is also important to recognize that certain situations can lead to eating extra calories. For example, this can happen when you are distracted and not really paying attention to what you are eating. For example, when you are eating in a dark room, and can’t see your food very well, or when you are in a large group, socializing, and not listening to your body’s signals.

Studies show that friends can influence each other’s eating behavior. You have to be aware that some friends may push you toward unhealthy behavior, while other friends may support a healthy lifestyle. If you have a friend who consistently pushes you toward unhealthy behavior, and you cannot control yourself, you are going to have to confront that friend, and ask for help. If your friend refuses to help you, and keeps sabotaging you, of course you’re going to have to ask yourself what kind of a friend she really is. On the other hand, some friends will support you in your efforts to have a healthy lifestyle. They will work out with you, eat healthy meals with you, go to farmers' markets with you, and enjoy a variety of healthy activities with you! Try to spend time with friends who have the same positive goals you have.

When it comes to eating out with a large group, or with that thin friend, there are a couple of tricks to help you stay in control. Before you go out, the simple act of "pre-snacking" on a little bit of protein (such as a low fat mozarella stick), can really help you control you portion size and calories. Once you are at a party or restaurant, try to start with some healthy low sodium vegetable soup, a green salad, or choose a veggie plate. Getting your appetite under control this way will allow you to slow down and enjoy your meal and a bit of dessert.

The goal is to avoid feeing ravenous, eating too quickly, too much, and feeling out of control. It is awful to feel bloated and sorry after overeating, and to find that you've eaten so quickly that you didn't enjoy anything. A little pre-planning can help you enjoy your time with your friends, and feel great afterwards!

To learn how to handle other "Hunger Triggers" read on to my next blog entries...